In Part one of Sex, Money and Relationships, (Part one can be read here: http://bit.ly/bHMBK7) I laid the foundation of duality, and suggested the needs of the body hooked us, thereby tethering us to one side of the duality. I suggested looking at the needs of the body as one end of a continuum and the power of the Spirit as the other end. The continuum is not opposites; indeed the continuum is a Sacred Spiral. Each time we circle the Spiral we will have had to transcend some aspect of the duality.
For a host of reasons having to do with our old ‘lizard brain’ and our indoctrination, sex, money and relationships are inexorably intertwined. Think about this for a minute: If the people down the street from where you grew up raised you, you’d be a different person.
What YOU actually think about sex and money and relationships most likely is a mystery unless you have undertaken a rigorous Spiritual Path. To some degree, you are a compilation –a collage if you will- of influences and histories.
What you like to think of as your identity, the story of your life that you call ‘me”, ‘Mine”, “I” actually isn’t you. To find our self, we journey the Sacred Spiral. Sex, money, relationships are choice points on this Spiral: do we stay with the old collage or step onto the unknown territory of our authenticity?
There is nothing authentic about faking enjoyment of either money or sex. There is nothing authentic about pretending you are better because you have money or sex.
Without mutual Trust, Respect, Equality, Generosity, Compassion, Sharing (just to name a few Spiritual Principals) in a relationship, your Sacred Spiral flat lines.
More, more, more to some extent is a normal human thought. Acting upon the more, more, more takes your life straight to hell. What do I mean by hell? Hell is the belief in separation: that the body is it, you are your body and you are your thoughts. Pure hell.
Heaven on earth is an awareness of our oneness-regardless of the duality our 5 sensory perceptions report. Heaven is our ability to answer the question, “what is this for?” with the affirmation, “Oneness.”
Our ego can operate with the shadow and to a limited extent the light. It’s ego’s nature to fixate on 5 sensory perceptions-which is a limitation-a natural glass ceiling. Ego can only deliver you so far. After that, your ascension is a result of two things: your willingness to have an authentic experience of your true self, and your ability to surrender to the greater Cosmic Forces knowing all is well.
In duality you are either going to learn through Joy or through Pain. It’s the duality within the duality. You either hit the glass ceiling with Joy or in pain.
Translated to sex:
The use of your body is oneness. Every experience is a joyful one to oneness or a painful one to separation. You either accept that you want to learn through Joy so you understand what turns you on-or you are at the effect of the shadow and playing victim with an unsatisfied sex life.
Translated to money:
The use of your money is oneness. Every experience you have is either seen as part of the Principal of Giving and receiving, equal exchanges of energy, blessings everyone and everything-or it is an experience of lack and limitation, which then co-creates more lack and limitation.
Some explicit examples:
“I’ve lost a third of my money in the market.” When I ask the questions:
How was your money invested?
How much money did you begin with?
I always uncover the person had no idea their money was invested in junk, because, “that’s my financial planner’s job.” I also uncover the money is invested in opposition to their values (like oil and gas because they need to be “diversified” when they claim they want to be green) and it always comes to light they have much more money now than when they started, but some how they convince themselves they have lost something.
Here is an example with sex:
“I know we have children and all that, but we are always tired, or running here and there, we don’t have time for sex.”
And of course a deeper inquiry reveals that carpooling, sitters, and play-dates are all underutilized, and no one is a victim. We are always choosing heaven or hell. Consciously or unconsciously. Not choosing is even a choice.
So here is my question for you: Do you want to learn in this Duality through Joy or Pain?
Now look at your sex, money and relationships and see what blocks your awareness of your oneness?
I hope you use Valentines Day, not as the commercialized, secularized contemporized event it has become-but as the time to recommit to yourself, your partner to learn oneness through Joy.
May you have heaven on earth.
